Tuesday, December 26, 2006

I think it's a good time to laugh off some of the calories we added over the holidays. I present for your laughification, some funny quotes from 2006.

The internet is not something you just dump something on. It's not a truck. It's a series of tubes. And if you don't understand, those tubes can be filled and if they are filled, when you put your message in, it gets in line and it's going to be delayed by anyone that puts into that tube enormous amounts of material, enormous amounts of material." --Senate Commerce Committee Chairman Ted Steven (R-AK), explaining the workings of the Internet during a debate on net neutrality

"God is the one who chooses our rulers." --Rep. Katherine Harris (R-Fla.), explaining why the separation of church and state is "a lie." Harris also said, "If you are not electing Christians, then in essence you are going to legislate sin."

"[He has] a career of slavishly supporting the Republican Party." – House Minority Whip Steny Hoyer, (D-MD) on Maryland Lt. Gov. Michael Steele, an African-American Republican running for Senate

"I'm the decider, and I decide what is best. And what's best is for Don Rumsfeld to remain as the Secretary of Defense." --President Bush

"This fellow here, over here with the yellow shirt, macaca, or whatever his name is. He's with my opponent. He's following us around everywhere. And it's just great. ... Let's give a welcome to macaca, here. Welcome to America and the real world of Virginia." --Sen. George Allen (R-VA), ridiculing S.R. Sidarth, a 20-year-old Virginian native of Indian descent, by using an ethnic slur referring to a type of monkey found mainly in Asia

We have it. The smoking gun. The evidence. The potential weapon of mass destruction we have been looking for as our pretext of invading Iraq. There's just one problem - it's in North Korea.
Jon Stewart